I recently watched a talk by therapist Amy Pershing, a pioneer in the treatment of eating disorders. Her comparison between diet culture and the concept of a cult has stayed with me ever since. She suggested that what we refer to as “diet culture” operates much like a cult.

Researchers who study cults describe them as groups built around a mission, person, or idea that use pressure, control, and shame to keep their members in line while punishing independent thinking.

Consider how we are taught to feel about our bodies:

– We are either “in” or “out,” with our standing determined by how we look.

– We are discouraged from trusting our own hunger, fullness, or comfort—instead, we’re told to follow external rules (the latest diet, plan, or guideline about what is considered “healthy”).

– Straying from this narrative leads to feelings of shame, judgment, or worse.

– This messaging begins at a young age and never truly subsides.

Research shows that half of 10-year-old girls report feeling better about themselves when they are dieting. Over 90% of 18-year-old girls express unhappiness with their bodies. Body dissatisfaction among men has tripled over the last 25 years. None of us opted into this discomfort; we were recruited at a young age, often without a chance to resist.

Why Reframing is Important

Comparing diet culture to a cult is useful because it removes the blame from individuals.

For those of us who have spent years feeling we should just “get over” body shame, or who feel guilty for the energy we’ve invested in fighting our own bodies, this perspective offers something different. We haven’t failed at willpower; we have been up against a system designed to be exceptionally difficult to resist.

Recognizing this can evoke a useful feeling: anger. Not directed at ourselves, but at the system—a massive industry that profits from our dissatisfaction. This redirected anger can become fuel for change.

Five Ways to Break Free

Based on years of clinical practice, Pershing identifies five key strategies that help individuals loosen the grip of diet culture:

1. Reconnecting with Your Body’s Signals: Many of us have learned to ignore our feelings of hunger, fullness, tiredness, and even our emotions because we are so focused on how our bodies look instead of how they feel. The good news is that these internal signals are recoverable, often with patience and practice.

2. Naming Your Personal Story: Beliefs such as “my worth depends on my weight” or “I can’t feel confident unless I look a certain way” often stem from specific moments or messages in our lives. Identifying where a belief originated can be the first step in loosening its hold.

3. A Simple Tool for Moments of Shame: The POWR approach offers four steps: Pause into presence, Open and allow, Wisely consider, and Respond with care. This method helps create a space between a shame spiral and your response to it.

4. Allowing Room to Grieve: It’s valid to feel grief over time spent worrying about our bodies or relationships, experiences we missed out on, or money spent chasing unattainable standards. This grief deserves acknowledgment, not dismissal.

5. Building Community: Small actions matter: speak about our bodies with kindness, compliment others on qualities beyond their appearance, and connect with one or two people who are also questioning the messages we’ve absorbed. Healing doesn’t require escaping the culture entirely; it can happen while still existing within it, alongside those who support our questioning.

A Final Thought

Pershing shared a memorable idea: “Judgments of your body by others don’t belong to you.” If someone judges our body, it reflects their own beliefs and the messages they have internalized—not our worth. We can choose to hand that judgment back, with compassion, and prevent it from becoming part of our narrative.

We didn’t choose to be drawn into this culture, but we can choose, gently and imperfectly, to begin finding our way out.

Pershing, A. (2023). Body as Billboard to Body as Home, PESI.

Leilani Norman, MS, LMFTA, CCTP-II, ECDCS, is a therapist specializing in mid- to later-life transitions, caregiving, couples work, and complex trauma.